I Am Entitled to Both Seats Now

As I mentioned earlier I now have too much blood. I probably produced even more blood since I wrote this.

My mom suggested, very strongly, that I buy a maternity belt. I her view, the belt will prevent the stretch marks. I have not heard that from any other source. Nevertheless, maternity belts are recommended to relive various discomforts. So I went out and bought one. Salesgirls showed me how to put it on.

I suspect there is more to putting it on, or at least to readjusting it ten thousand times a day as my belly grows. Because I think it cut the circulation of blood because the belt was sinking into my thighs too much.

During the morning commute yesterday I put my purse on my lap. It felt heavy and it hurt my legs. Happy Valentine’s Day!

Speaking of the latter, my husband brought me some giant rose and a fancy bar of largely forbidden calorie-laden and caffeine-rich chocolate. He also took me out to a nice restaurant. In the past several years we developed into particularly finicky eaters and drinkers. Last year we didn’t like our Valentine’s dinner that much, and we didn’t like it that much this year. The problem with fancy eating on Valentine’s Day is that restaurateurs seem to imagine that they have a captive audience. So they put out their little pries-fix menus and they don’t even try. My husband suggested that next year we go out for a nice dinner the day before or the day after instead.

To go back to my condition, my legs started to feel a bit funny last night. They felt a bit funny when I woke up. In the middle of the day today they felt positively heavy.

So I asked a particularly matronly co-worker whether she could tell if I’m retaining water. She didn’t know! Now I can see through her veneer. She always talks about babies and how cute they are, but she doesn’t know about retaining water! She sent me to another co-worker who told me to poke myself in the leg, cut down on salts, drink cranberry juice and eat apples.

On the way back I put my purse on the seat next to me. I put my feet on the footrest. But then a girl walked in who wanted to seat next to me. I suppose the bus was full… I now unbutton my coat as often as I can because on one hand, I am always hot on account of having too much blood. On the other, my coat covers up my condition – somewhat. If I want people to give up their seats for me, I have to let them know. Anyhow, the girl who set next to me should have known that I’m carrying a bay. What she didn’t know is that I now feel entitled to both seats – one for me and one for my purse!


February 16, 2007. Breedosaurus.

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